Thursday, September 30, 2010

Raptor Propaganda

This is the face of the enemy ladies and gentlemen.

In my time there has been no greater threat to the continuation of the human species than this evil-incarnated, virtual, raptor propaganda device. This green raptor spews more child-friendly lies than Spongebob spreads liberal agendas. He trots around the "Mushroom Kingdom" constantly repeating his name so those who witness his atrocities never forget. He is the single most perfect example of raptor acceptance in this world that must stop if we are to win the growing species war.

For you see he does not effect us in the way most raptors do, but instead pollutes the minds of our children and misguided Nintendo fans with the ideas that raptors are just cute animals that we could domesticate. While we should embrace the idea that raptors can be controlled and owned, we must also remember how dangerous they are to the security of our evolutionary line.

Raptors must be criminalized and hated such as we have done with the nazis. We must revile them and absolutely abhor their very existence. We must rise up and cast aside the idea that those green monsters can be our friends or even just coexist with them. We must rip down all raptor propaganda, such as this thing, and present our new form of truth. We must rise up and say no more to their treatment with anything less than sudden death. We must realize the threat and make sure all know of the evil that looms behind the great wall of lies.

So remove the mario roms from your emulators, cast aside your cartridges, and delete all your Mario Kart data on that cursed DS. Instead place in a copy of Jurassic Park and see what Yoshi looks like without the filter.


Crunky said...

Is a little red x really a threat to human civilisation?

(oh and your pic is busted)

Come At Me Bro said...

Love it!

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